I would like to bring to the public’s attention the blatant liberal propaganda that is being billed as a fun and addictive game for your iPhone or iPod Touch. This brainwashing technique is named “Tilt To Live”, and for a nominal price you can get this through the App Store.
This devious mechanism purports to be a game of skill and strategy, where the player navigates his “guy” around the screen, avoiding his enemies, whose merest touch is fatal. Scattered throughout the field of play are various “weapons” that the player can use to defend himself, and eliminate his opposition. Or her opposition for you gender-confused types. But really, girls, playing video games? Please. Only men play video games, women don’t have the faculties for it. Same for voting. Anyhow…
The real issue with this game, however, is not in its clever design, or easy-to-learn-difficult-to-master gameplay and interface. It’s not the fantastic use of the iP*’s accelerometers that allow you to move your “guy” around simply by tilting the device. It’s that it is corrupting our nation’s minds with its insidious propaganda. See, the player’s “guy” is an arrow, pointing true and forward, just like the liberal elite would have you believe that the progressive movement is. All the while you are avoiding your enemies who are of course, red dots.
This game would have you believe that the red dots, an obvious representation of good, solid, red-state conservatives, are your enemy, and their merest touch is enough to destroy you. I suppose that this could be true, that if you successfully get through to a liberal with solid conservative philosophy, he is dead as far as the progressive socialists are concerned. But to show them as a mindless, ravenous horde of red dots who simply swarm and make clever patterns in an effort to destroy you simply demeans those true Americans whose minds and hearts are rooted in solid heartland values.
Also, the weapons that are used to defend your little leftist arrow include “nukes”, green bubble shields, vortex-creating black holes, and blue bubbles with swirling spikes which allow you to sweep through the red dots without any harm. There is also another blue weapon that when triggered freezes the red dots, encasing them in a lump of bluish ice, waiting to be impaled on the point of the Pelosi-loving arrow. You can also get an electrical shield to electrocute the red dots, in a blatant attempt to show the liberal mantra that anyone who does not agree with them deserves to die, except of course convicted murderers sentenced to execution.
So if you want a truly addictive game with great replay value, exciting music, and cleverly written achievements, then get “Tilt To Live” by http://www.onemanleft.com but be sure to say a couple of prayers and wrap yourself in a big blanket with a picture of a great American on it, preferably Glenn Beck or maybe Rush Limbaugh, if you have a king-sized bed. Maybe play some Souza marches or a recording of Pat Robertson singing “God Bless America” to protect you from the insidious liberal socialist mind-warping propaganda. But you will play it. It’s as enjoyable as that Mary Jane all the tree-hugging hippies smoke, and even more addictive than their heroin.
Tags: apps · Games · holy crap it is fun · ipodNo Comments
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